I shall forewarn anyone about to read this, this is the story of the birth of my son. It’s not cute or sugar-coated. This is my experience with my natural, home birth.
Regardless of how much I researched, read or practiced, nothing could tell me how labor was going to be for me personally.
I wasn’t scared because I had read how it’s all in the mind, if you let yourself think of it as painful, it will be painful. The only thing I had ever heard about contractions is they were intense pains. Something you’ll never know until you have them. That the epidural is a life saver.
After reading many natural birth stories and freeing my mind of negative thoughts and stigmas around birth and labor, I knew it wouldn’t hurt, it would be different, yes. Uncomfortable, for sure, but nothing my body wasn’t capable of handling with ease if in the right mindset.
Now I have to admit I do consider myself quite tough when it comes to the pain tolerance board, I know many people say this and will boast it but I’ve taken a beating and not winced, think of the movie Kickass minus the cool actual no feeling part. I just learned to surpress pain as a common feeling.
So I must say I didn’t really ever think having a baby would hurt, just be a weird new sensation down there. Maybe that’s why it was exactly that for me. Let me explain.
Wednesday May 6th 2015(3 days overdue) around approximately 11:45ish pm, I felt sick, like diarrhea sick, so I ran to the bathroom, did my business and went back to bed. This continued two more times before I realized that the feeling may be something more. I ignored that feeling and went back to bed one more time before I went back and started vomitting. I then thought I must just have eaten something that’s making me sick. Again, back to bed.
Once more the diarrhea feeling but now, nothing was coming out. So I looked at my phone, opened the contraction timer app I had downloaded and started hitting “Start” and “Stop” it was consecutively roughly 45sec-1 minute long and about 2-5 minutes apart.
I went in the room and told Brad, I think I may be in labor, maybe we should call Mary, our midwife.
We called, she told us to continue to track for an hour and see if they continued, if not, not to worry.
I couldn’t go back to sleep, it was uncomfortable. I’d pace, go to the bathroom which seemed to feel the best, like I mentioned, imagine having the feeling of diarrhea but nothing comes out. No bueno.
Eventually an hour had passed and the contractions had not, we called Mary yet again and informed her. She headed our way.
Maybe it was the comfort in knowing she was coming or just the funny way things work, but then my body relaxed and I could rest.
She showed up about an hour later (almost 2am) and asked how it was going, I told her the same. We then walked around outside which was nice, it was a cool, quiet morning. The sky was purple and I could see a ton of stars, we walked until I was tired of it and then turned around.
The contractions started to get more intense, they moved up to what I compare to my period cramps, that squeeze feeling that makes it seem like your ovaries are imploding. Again, nothing crazy or too abnormal just uncomfortable.
We got back to the house and we continued to talk and I’d pace the house every so often. Eventually she called her assistant and she had showed around 6am. They went to breakfast since nothing seemed to be changing.
I decided to nap. I’d fall in and out of sleep, then it got a little more uncomfortable, this one I don’t really have a comparison to other than a cyst bursting, if you haven’t felt this, it’s very uncomfortable with bouts of OUCH.
I couldn’t find a comfortable position I tossed and turned, went from the couch to the floor, to the couch and eventually into the bed. I eventually managed to relax and I think it was my body’s way of getting ready for what was about to happen, which was nice of it seeing as I hadn’t slept.
I had already told Brad to call her at this point letting her know they had gotten closer together and more intense. I laid thinking about meeting my baby, how I’ve waited so long and was so ready to have him in my arms. To finally see his face and hold him close. I was ready.
They had already prepped the room prior to their departure to breakfast. I was laying on people training pads, :). Unsure of what exactly was going to come next.
They told me to just go with it, I remembered what I had read in The Bradley Method but couldn’t remember what stage I was supposed to do them in, or what stage I was officially in. SOOOO I just breathed deep breaths, in through the nose, out through the mouth. Over and over and over until I asked if I was supposed to push.
Being my first baby I was unaware that the transition stage where you go from just contractions to the NEED to push wasn’t mistakeable for anything else.
So I pushed here and there, because I thought I was supposed to. It didn’t feel wrong, but at that point my lower body had gone numb, I don’t know if this is from my pre-existing nerve issues in my back but it made it very hard for me to feel a contraction and when I was supposed to push.
I would try to go with it when I thought I was feeling one and he would come down more, so I assume I was doing it right.
They had been constantly checking his heartbeat which was making me uneasy, but not saying anything. I now know it was to keep me calm. I later realized there was a sense of urgency in their subtle way in the end.
I loved to sit on the toilet, remember that diarrhea with nothing coming? Oh it was coming, just big and from the other side. The toilet made it easier for me though, maybe because that’s where I push? I don’t exactly know but I do know that I had gotten him down but not crowning and was walking to the bedroom when IT hit.
Transition. If you’ve read about this, they tell you it’s a tidal wave of feeling, and that is THEE best way to describe it. I stopped mid stride and moaned. It was intense. My body just said, PUSSSSHHHHH!
I was a little overwhelmed by it but managed to get back to the bedroom and onto the birthing stool.
I remember staring into Brad’s eyes as he coached me through my breathing and told me I got this.
I remember knowing I had to get him out.
I remember pushing harder than I had the whole time.
Then, he flew out, literally, into the midwife’s hands. I couldn’t believe it, it was over.
My baby was born. At 12:52pm May 7th 2015 Osryc Alan made his debut. He was perfect, beautiful and quiet.
Brad had to take him as I needed to get the placenta out, I was hemmorraging and bleeding a lot. I got pushed it out and got a shot to help my blood clot. I lost 2 liters of blood, was a little weak but nothing was going to stop me from being with him.
They brought him to me and I held him, stroking his face, I couldn’t believe how beautiful he was. Perfect.
We finally had our prince.